He misinterpreted the nature of the meeting, later telling the woman he’d been set up with that he didn’t want to see her anymore because he was dating his matchmaker. Goldman said, “because she was just about to kill me.”Men, as is their wont, are sneaky, and it can take a while to catch on to clients who aren’t direct.Some even come to see their matchmakers as surrogate girlfriends.Welcome to the awkward, sexually charged flip side of the dating business.How each matchmaker deals with this romantic obstacle course depends on his or her own professional standards in a burgeoning industry with few rules.“Matchmakers aren’t robots,” said Amy Laurent, a relationship expert and Bravo reality TV star.“If a hot guy comes into the interview, of course I turn red.” Ms.
She said no.“After that happened, I will never date a potential client again,” she said.
Her clients often look at her as an ideal match, despite, she says, that she is not selling herself as one. Ray, who is in a relationship, “then they want an equivalent. Spindel, who has worked in the business for 24 years, says she’s responsible for 1,517 of them—“or something like that”—and sees herself as the city’s unmatched ’maker.
So my job is to find the equivalent version of me.”hough none admitted to it, it seems that many matchmakers go into the business to meet romantic partners—there are way more women in New York than there are men, and the competition can get tough—and to reaffirm their own attractiveness. More often than not, the male clients are catches, too, in a superficial sense.
Spindel, who is decidedly unwedded, spends the majority of her waking hours wading through the gritty details of desire.
On telephone calls with potential clients and daily simulated dates throughout the city, countless men, and some women, reveal to her their most deep-seated and peculiar relationship needs in the way a patient might divulge his or her unfiltered feelings to a psychotherapist. Spindel recounted in a manner somewhat clinical, the client who asked for a blonde, blue-eyed version of Kim Kardashian, “but a size zero.” (Who wouldn’t?